Yesterday we celebrated having been living in the south for a year. It’s been a great year, we welcomed a baby girl to our family, I landed my absolute dream job, the kids got into a great center and we are in the process of buying a house. Yet, even with all these great things there is one thing that I wish I had put more effort into doing.
The first job I started at after a month of being a STHM was as an HR Manager. I was scary. My office was the equivalent of the principal’s office. When you move to a new place, work is the one place you can really count on to meet new people and I was unable to do that.
Additional with children it’s hard to give up weekends when you work full time and nights are usually out of the question, considering I typically fall asleep putting them to bed around 7:30. Parent groups are great, but most of them meet during the week to give kids at home interaction with other kids and parents some much needed adult conversation.
over the past few weeks I’ve started putting more effort in. Here is my list of some ways to meet new people when you move to a new area.
Solution 1, Lady dates: My husband has made handfuls of friends through work, through people at work and just in passing. He has that charismatic personality that just draws people in. He even set me up on ‘dates’ with some of the women he works with. At first I was offended that my husband was pitying me so much, that he was trying to make friends for me. Then I realized that I needed to swallow my pride, turn my resting bitch face off, and drink some wine.
Solution 2, Apps: I recently came across a few apps that I am trying out
- Vina (which is new and just recently became available for Columbia) is like Tinder, but for friends. And women. It’s ideally the perfect app to fix my new friends problem. The only issue, because it is so new, there aren’t many users and those who are on it don’t appear to be that active. Or I guess everyone just swiped left for me.
- MeetUp another app to meet people in your area, but a much larger following. People create groups and post about events. You can pick groups to follow based on the group descriptions. You can even create new groups and events. I have found a few groups that I am following and waiting for a local event.
Solution 3, Your Kids: It’s is now what I have dubbed “birthday season”. Maddox came home with THREE birthday invitations last week from school. Birthday parties are a great place to meet others who have common interests/priorities – their kids.
Solution 4, Neighbors: I wish I had made more of an effort when we first moved into our apartment to connect with the neighbors. Most of the folks in our building seem around the same age as us, and at various points in their lives. Some had kids, some were single and some partied a lot. The people who are in the closest proximity to you sometimes make the best people to be around. Just like the people you work with, neighbors can be easy acquaintances, you just have to take the time and make the effort to get to know them.
Solution 5, Talk to people. Somehow my husband is able to make friends anywhere. It is one of his many amazing qualities and something I admire and wish I could do. I will admit, I am trying. I am trying to be more friendly and put on a more welcoming face. I am pushing myself to have conversations with people that I share space with, whether in the elevator, or a shared table in the hospital cafe.